The Complete Collection of Men Jokes

What I want in a man




What I Want In A Man, Original List ...(at age 22)


1. Handsome 
2. Charming 
3. Financially Successful 
4. A Caring Listener 
5. Witty 
6. In Good Shape 
7. Dresses with Style 
8. Appreciates the Finer Things 
9. Full of Thoughtful Surprises 
10. An Imaginative, Romantic Lover 

      
What I Want In A Man, Revised List ...(at age 32) 

1. Nice Looking - preferably with hair on his head 
2. Opens car doors, holds chairs 
3. Has enough money for a nice dinner at restaurant 
4. Listens more than he talks 
5. Laughs at my jokes at appropriate times 
6. Can carry in all the groceries with ease 
7. Owns at least one tie 
8. Appreciates a good home cooked meal 
9. Remembers Birthdays and Anniversaries 
10. Seeks romance at least once a week 


What I Want In A Man, Revised List ...(at age 42) 

1. Not too ugly - bald head OK 
2. Doesn't drive off until I'm in the car 
3. Works steady - splurges on dinner at McDonnalds
4. Nods head at appropriate times when I'm talking 
5. Usually remembers the punch lines of jokes 
6. Is in good enough shape to rearrange the furniture 
7. Usually wears shirt that covers stomach 
8. Knows not to buy champagne with screw-top lids 
9. Remembers to put the toilet seat lid down
10. Shaves on most weekends 


What I Want In A Man, Revised List ...(at age 52) 

1. Keeps hair in nose and ears trimmed to appropriate
length 
2. Doesn't belch or scratch in public 
3. Doesn't borrow money too often 
4. Doesn't nod off to sleep while I'm emoting 
5. Doesn't re-tell same joke too many times 
6. Is in good enough shape to get off couch on
weekends 
7. Usually wears matching socks and fresh underwear 
8. Appreciates a good TV Dinner 
9. Remembers your name on occasion 
10. Shaves on some weekends      


What I Want In A Man, Revised List ...(at age 62) 

1. Doesn't scare small children 
2. Remembers where bathroom is 
3. Doesn't require much money for upkeep 
4. Only snores lightly when awake (LOUDLY when asleep)

5. Forgets why he's laughing 
6. Is in good enough shape to stand up by himself 
7. Usually wears some clothes 
8. Likes soft foods 
9. Remembers where he left his teeth 
10. Remembers when... 


What I Want In A Man, Revised List ...(at age 72) 
     
1. Breathing




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