- Men and women were created equal,
but women continued to improve.
- Men approve of premarital sex until daughters are born.
- Women are a pain in the ass,
men are a pain EVERYWHERE!
- Men are always ready to respect anything that bores them.
- Men are creatures with two legs and eight hands.
- Men are either born with consciences, or marry them.
- Men are from Mars, women are from Venus
- Men are fun to argue with, because even IF they win...they lose.
- Men are gonna be the death of me...
but what a way to go!
- Men are great! Every woman should own one!!!
- Men are just boys in better bodies!
- Men are just like computers, and a smart woman keeps a backup.
- Men are like bras: they offer light, medium and complete support.
- Men are like buses: they come every 15 minutes.
- Men are like fires: They go out if unattended!
- Men are like teeth. You ignore them - you lose them.
- Men are only good for one thing...two, if they're good at it.
- Men are the reason that women hate one another.
- Men bond by giving criticism, women bond by giving support.
- Men come in three sizes:
small, medium, and OOoohhh yesss!
- Men do come with instructions, they're just written in pig latin.
- Men do not roar. Women roar, and they hurl heavy objects.
- Men do too get PMS:
Penis Malfunction Syndrome.
Pre-Middle aged Syndrome.
Post Macho Syndrome.
- Men don't care what's on TV.
They only care what *else* is on TV.
- Men don't get cellulites. God might just be a man.
- Why women like bidets?
Because men don't know what they are.
- Men don't whistle at me. The sight of me leaves them breathless.
- Men give love to get sex,
Women give sex to get love.
- Men have a joystick whereas women just have a game port.
- Women have no civil rights when men jab uncivil lefts.
- Two aliens were discussing earth beings.
"So what do you think of them?" said the first. "Well," the other replied, "I
liked the intelligent ones,
but I wasn't so keen on the ones with testicles."
- Men invented computers to drive women crazier!
- Men know life too early, women too late.
- Men like phones with lots of buttons. It makes them feel important.
- Men love sex with redheads, but their wives don't appreciate it!
- Men of quality respect women's equality.
- Men play the game. Women know the score.
- Men read Playboy for the articles
women go to malls for the music.
- Men snore to protect their women from wild animals.
- Men wear the pants. Women wear the panties.
- Men wear their hair 3 ways: parted, unparted & departed.
- Men who have playful kittens shouldn't sleep in the nude.
- Men who know they are geniuses usually aren't.
- Scientists say: Men who listen to classical music tend not to spit.
- Men! Go figure!
- Men! Learn from John Bobbitt.
Don't cheat on your girlfriend/wife!
- Men! Learn from John Bobbitt.
Sleep on your stomachs!
- Woman's best X-mas gift? To add ex- to man!
- Men, Just children with paycheques.
- Men, stupid? You'd be dense too if you had your brain in your pants!
- Men... Pat their tush and they'll do all your bidding.
- Men are better than cucumbers.
Cucumbers can't lift boxes.
- Men? On the whole, I'd rather buy new batteries.
- MEN ver. 1.0 .... bugs found .... rewrite.... WOMEN ver. 1.1(beta)
- Q: How is a condom and a woman alike?
A: They both spend more time in a man's wallet than on his penis. submitted by BoyOBoy640
- What do you get with three men in a volkswagon?
Farfromthinking Submitted by Alexandria
- It was love at first sight. He walked by and I saw the twinkle in his
eye.
I never knew that someone could be so in love with his own
reflection in the mirror.Submitted by Alexandria
- Men: Good from far, far from good. Submitted by Cathy
- All men are apes - some of them just walk better than the others. Submitted by Michelle
- How do you get a man on the roof?
Tell him the beers on the house. Submitted by Super Ted :o)
- When is a man worth 25 cents?
When he is pushing a trolley at K-mart. Submitted by Verena
- Marrying a divorced man is ecologically responsible.
In a world where there are more women than men, it pays to recycle. Submitted by Kat__99
- If a man had a thought in his head, it would get lonely! Submitted by Tasha
- Do you always tell your husband when you've had an orgasm?
No way! I'm not going to call home every time! Submitted by Liana
- When does a man develop a brain?
The day he gets married. Submitted by Heath
- Why is virginity like a baloon?
All it takes is one small prick and it's gone. Submitted by Tricia
- What does PMS really stand for?
- Promoting Male Slavery. Submitted by "ktufts"
- When do most men know when to stop having sex?
When he had his orgasm. Submitted by RisqMan
- What is the difference between garbage and men?
Garbage gets thrown out and stays out! Submitted by Gordon
- Daughter: Mum, what's a penis?
Mother: That's where dad wees from.
Daughter: Well, what's a prick?
Mother: That's easy. It's the rest of him. Submitted by Gilbert
- Why don't men die in their sleep?
'Cos they can't do two things at the same time. Submitted by Cara
- What do you call a caring, considerate and gifted man?
A Myth. Submitted by Robin
- Why are men like bactrian camels?
Because just as soon as you get over one clump of useless flesh,
there's another one right in front of you! Submitted by Corinne
- Why do women always wear black to bed???
To mourn the dead pricks beside them!! Submitted by Erica
- Why did God Create man first?
1. Practice makes perfect.
2. Give us someone to bitch at immidately.
3. There's a frist draft with anything.
4. To see what needed to be fixed and then make the proper changes.
5. First is the worst.........Second is the best!
6. To be funny Submitted by Kate4249
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