Men are like MEN ARE LIKE... buttons - they're always popping off at the wrong time character actors - when they show any character, they're acting cliffs - most are just a big bluff clocks - their hands are always moving over figures coffee - the best ones are rich, warm and can keep you going all night long colds - you can never get rid of the bad ones in a hurry cookies - underneath, most are just plain crumbs coolers - load them up with beer and you can take them anywhere concrete - after getting laid, they take a long time to get hard crowbars - they're not much to crow about, but that doesn't bar anything drips - you can hear them, but you can't turn them off dry cleaners - most work fast and leave no ring fish - they keep getting into trouble when they can't keep their mouths shut flowers - they're often potted goats - they just love to butt in horoscopes - they always tell you what to do and usually they are wrong instant coffee - easy to make lilacs - most can lie like anything magicians - they can turn almost anything into an argument parking spaces - the good ones are taken and what's left are handicapped pigs - which explains why they cannot contact mad cow disease snowstorms - you never know how many inches you'll get, or how long it'll last tile - lay them right and you can walk on them for years vacations - they never seem to be long enough wheelbarrows - they all need to be pushed